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May Be The Saddest Thing I’ve Ever Read

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Bill Zeller

This is the saddest thing I’ve ever read. I found it at Gizmodo, a technology blog that isn’t known for being exactly warm and fuzzy.

If you know someone like Bill Zeller, or if you are someone like Bill Zellerplease, please reach out to him or her.

And please pass this along.

That’s all, except my apology if the software that creates “related stories” is showing you anything, and for the adverts that run here (they run on all our posts and our software doesn’t permit us to turn them off selectively).

Ironically, I’m sure Bill would have known what to do.

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2 Comments

  1. I did not know the man and I don’t suffer having had an abusive past, but through this letter I could feel his pain, his torment and his utter despair. I cried through the entire letter. I will never forget how I felt reading it. And I will never forget the man’s pain. Pain is too weak a word to begin to describe how completely his feeling, emotions, spirituality and everything else about him were hijacked by this tragedy. And I simply can’t, for my own sanity, begin to consider how many other fellow human beings suffer this same living hell.

    I’m a 56 year old man, who has lived a life of extremes, in every sense. I no longer fear anything, except perhaps immortality. I am rarely, if ever, surprised by anything. I tend to keep people at a distance because I am very sensitive to their “energy” and have to remain on guard so as not to absorb too much of their “pain” – again, a simplified use of the word. I suffered my own personal tragedies, many self-constructed, survived years that amounted to committing a slow suicide and the one actual sleeping pill OD attempt, moved beyond the frustration and sheer madness of trying to find my purpose, made peace with my spiritual beliefs, continue to struggle with addictions (alcohol, replaced by methamphetamine, to be replaced by?)and continue on doing what I do best. I survive.

    I’m not sure what I am trying to express. I just know that reading this letter made me need to post my first ever comment on the internet. I certainly agree with Jeff’s plea to pass this along and for anyone who suffers the same, or knows someone who does, or interacts with someone who suffers this way to PLEASE, PLEASE reach out. In my daily interactions I try to let people know that I care and I always can find time to listen. Please be aware that many, many times when someone chooses to confide in you, or presents themselves as wanting your opinion or your help with something, what they really want and need is just for someone to listen. Not offer advice, tell them what they should do, try to solve the problem, judge them, or anything EXCEPT LISTEN. Help somebody today and every day by resisting the urge to talk and be more supportive and a much better friend by stepping off the soapbox and just listen. I decided against finishing my Master’s in Psychology, for the time being at least, where my focus was on working with Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender youth, many of whom suffer a past or current life of abuse, which is a contributing factor to this population group having the highest suicide rate. Words do not begin to describe the tragedy of this. But for me the time is not right. Maybe this is the time to re-evaluate and that is why I came across this posting. There are no coincidences.

    In closing I can only say I so admire and respect Bill for having the courage and strength to evaluate and make the decision that he did and follow through with what had become, to him, the only solution left. And he is the only person who has the right to make that decision. To the rest of us, it is an event that we observe to have happened, but other than acknowledging it’s existence, that is it.

  2. Gene, your comment was so thoughtful and beautiful. i haven’t felt suicidal, but have dealt with severe depression. it just breaks my heart to think of someone in their final moments, writing this and feeling so absolutely alone. your comment warmed my heart a little bit.

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